I guarantee you'll either be mugged or not appreciated. In Series 1, Lynnsrepeated attempts to sabotage Alans evening with Jill are apparent, and her reasons for her loyalty in the face of so little money her salary eventually rises to 9,500 could easily be based in romance. And he turns round with his gun and then he does a backward somersault off this ramp, and he, he lands on his feet - I'm not sure why, but he's not showing off. Share it in the comments. [a pause as Alan looks at the estate agent]. Alan Partridge: That? I've had enough of that! In 1974 I took the train from London to Crewe station. Alan Partridge: It's alright. Alan Partridge: If you think you can upstage Jill by wearing that you're very much mistaken. But fine, I'll sack her. It's called a Rover Metro now. Sophie Rundle: Motherhood has made me too tired to people-please', When presenter Steve Allen left LBC and his statement following immediate exit, Date of Ken Bruce's final day on Radio 2 and why he's leaving for Greatest Hits early, The Witch Trials of JK Rowling makes sensible points. Who is French for water. Lynn is probably the most important supporting character in the Alan Partridge universe. We're not straying from spoilers in here. Ugh. Its clear and simple., He is also a keen cook, gardener and birder. Part of HuffPost Entertainment. Are they gold? Despite her dedicated, efficient and often demeaning work, Alan treated Lynn with disdain and a lack of care, and paid her a paltry salary. Glanalang, langalangalanga, nobody does it better - and I'm a naked woman in silhouette with a gun, spinning round - Makes me feel sad for the rest. I'll tolerate one, but not both. Tony Hayers: Well, unfortunately for you, I am the Chief Commissioning Editor of BBC Television. Enjoy it. You're joking! Tony Hayers: [laughs] No! Publish Translation Find a translation for this quote in other languages: . In fact, it's happened, it's over, it's already happened, you are a sacked man. Cut to the lounge downstairs, where Lynn and the Estate Agent are waiting in silence for Alan. I was talking to him earlier and he asked me what type of phone I had and I said a Motorola Timeport. Rolled on the thighs of a virgin. Imagine ITV is a housing estate. Just a moment while we sign you in to your Goodreads account. I can read you like a book. Michael: [serving them their desserts] Here you go. And the bad news? Thanks very much for the gearknob, and good night. OK, uh small-talk. Lynn Benfield Lynn isprobably the only person that Alan has been close to in his life for longer than a few months, and while that might sound like a good thing, it also means shes also the only person hes comfortable in controlling and manipulating. [Taken aback, Lynn looks uncomfortable and doesn't say anything]. Details Picture that for a second - a blob of tofu the size and shape of a brain. He runs up on to the garage roof. 4. Go to London, and I guarantee you will be either assaulted or unappreciated. Take the train to London, stopping at Rejection, Disappointment, Backstabbing Central and Shattered Dreams Parkway. He panics, right? Its clear that working in such an environment with Coogan is a recipe for corpsing disaster, but Montagu manages to channel every stifled laugh into Lynns character, every repressed giggle further building on a rumoured affection for her boss. Let me tell you something about the Titanic, people forget, people forget that on the Titanic's maiden voyage there were over 1000 miles of uneventful, very pleasurable cruising before it hit the iceberg! (Not the catchphrase just a thought. Alan Partridge: It's Valentine's Day today, and love is in the air? Go and eat some coffee. covid pandemic Nevertheless, nice song. Alan Partridge: Right, I'll tell you an anecdote. She was often submissive when told-off or insulted by Alan. Tony Hayers: Why would I want to do that? He's going to die! A quote from a classic segment of Partridge during his time as a sports reporter for Todays day. Estate Agent: Would have been a different story, really. He was also a writer for Buzzfeed, GQ and The Sunday Times, covering everything from culture to tech and current affairs. Alan Partridge: Right. It really encapsulates the frustration of a Sunday, doesn't it? When I finally got there, all they had done was dig a big hole. Two radio and four television series have presented this spoof television and radio presenter through his career - as well as several TV and radio specials, two books, a web series, plus appearances on BBC's Comic Relief and a feature length film Alan Partridge: Alpha Papa. It was very crowded; I found myself in a last-minute rush for the one remaining seat beside a tall, good-looking man with collar-length hair, it was the seventies; buckaroo! Alan Partridge: Hm. Alan Partridge: Yeah, give me another series, you sh*t. [Tony Hayers has told Alan that although there won't be another series of his chat show, he'll still be open to any other ideas in future, so Alan seizes the opportunity to pitch his ideas for programs]. We haven't got a second series, I just didn't have the guts to say that earlier. My face was designed as a leisure accessory. It's embarrassing. Range Rover blackened, a little muscle. Alan Partridge: You work in a petrol station Michael. Knowing me, Alan Partridge, sacking you, Glenn Ponder. Itll probably all come crashing down in the end. "Her yelling continues until I answer the door to find her on her knees shouting through the letterbox, like a gynaecologist bellowing into a woman.". No, I always put my money there in the evening. And Jews a little bit. No one had heard of Oxford before Inspector Morse. I'm gonna have to tell some other Russians. "Smell my cheese, mother!" " Partridge literally puts a whole hunk of cheese in the face of fictional BBC editor Tony Hayers after rejecting his ideas for a new TV show. Alan Partridge: Oh, I like this. Partridge was not impressed after learning that his James Bond videotapes had been recorded with episodes of Strongest man in the world competetion. Alan Partridge: You could, couldn't you, yes. No, I think his silence speaks volumes. Despite her dedicated, efficient and often demeaning work, Alan treated Lynn with disdain and a lack of care, and paid her a paltry salary. Jason: [putting a party hat on Alan's head] Wahey! August knocked the trend for downturn in fireplace sales. What a year it's been for Dante. Could we see her finally standing up to her longstanding oppressor? Yeah, you're definitely sacked. Fantastic. Er, sorry. [he shuts the door and goes to another room]. [Lynn has come to the hotel to tell Alan that she's negotiated a walnut gearknob for his new, smaller Rover]. Blood dribbles down. Wretched.. 12. Alan Partridge: It flushed on the first yank! Michael: Right. Erm, terrible idea. Now, first award tonight is for best Christ. I've been working like a Japanese prisoner of war. Which ironically is like a large petrol station. [they lean in close to each other, face to face]. We're on a submarine. A, a glittering year ahead. The fiddling merely tantalises the itch, and it becomes more aggressive. Quotes are added by the Goodreads community and are not verified by Goodreads. Right, I'll tell you an anecdote. Alan Partridge: Have I got a second series? Michael: Aye. Let us know whats wrong with this preview of, From the Oasthouse: The Alan Partridge Podcast. Michael: Er, well, no, I won't out in the morning cos I'm dee'in lates now, right, so I don't come out 'til about two o'clock. Needless to say, I had the last laugh, now f*** off! Alan Partridge: I had hopes and dreams. Alan Partridge: You know, when I used to see you in reception, do you know what I used to think? Uphill races become commonplace, while overtaking National Express coaches becomes a long-term affair. I was gonna give out some some awards. Not my words Carol, the words of Top Gear magazine! Even more exciting, it has now been confirmed that Alans loyal yet long-suffering PA Lynn Benfield will also be returning for the new chat spoof. She's 14 years younger than me. And I've listened to your ideas, I've listened to them all, and I haven't liked a single one. Take her out to a local fort or a Victorianfolly. In volleyball, if you win a rally, you get one point. 7. Bloody Sunday Sunday. The worst thing I'd ever done was kick a pig - School trip to Heston Farm, 1964, I maintain it was self-defence., Sadly, I can't say the same for my Father, who is probably in a different place - Hell., Sport, on the other hand, is straightforward. Both valid. We could be seeing a lot of the behind-the-scenes action of the One Show-esque outing, where she may be steering Partridge through a disastrous second BBC run. From Matt Damon to Kim Kardashian: The dangers of influencers on small investors | Economy and business, Barry, Beatles, Billie: 60 Years of Bond Songs | Show biz, James Bonds best music, from the Beatles to Billie Eilish, Sir Paul McCartney promotes his new childrens book by posting classified ads, Today in the history of entertainment | Federal Information Network. A few years later, it was launched under the name ITV PLC. Peter Linehan: Has he given you another series? 21. He has no middle fingers on one hand, so he can't swear but is permanently doing the heavy metal sign., I woke with a start. Have something to add to this story? Y'know, a lot a' them's from broken hawmes. Partridges sexy speech leaves a lot to the imagination. Alan Partridge: Why are you wearing that snazzy cardigan? Our goofy radio host gives a unique introduction to the world of drug-based sex fetishes. I can read you like a book. I want a second series. But if you told me 25 years ago that I would be talking about rigid inflatable hulls with Dale Winton I would probably have spat at you. Alan Partridge: Well, it's just a title, I mean Erm No, uh-uh-uh, opening sequence, me, in Trafalgar Square, feeding the pigeons, going "Oh God!". Partridges addiction to chocolate takes a disturbing turn. At a sparsely attended funeral, his casket has been blessed and lowered into the ground. paul mccartney Youth Hosteling with Chris Eubank. He doesn't like that. [Alan shrugs wordlessly. I looked up and saw it was none other than Peter Purves, it was the pinnacle of his Blue Peter career. Blow 'im to bits. Here's how to do it. I'll be honest, I'm dead against it. And so after a final flurry scrit, scrit, scrit, scrit, scit, scrit, scrit, scrit, scrit, scrit, scrit, scrit, scrit, scrit, scrit, scrit, scrit, scrit I stop scratching. Back of the net! Otherwise they're going to declare you bankrupt on Friday. Alan Partridge: Yeah, well, that's not good enough. And then he goes, 'Ahhh!' In fact, it's happened, it's over, it's already happened, you are a sacked man. In a list drawn up by the British Film Institute in 2000, voted by industry professionals, I'm Alan Partridge was named the 38th best British television series of all time. Alan Partridge: Sorry, Michael, that was just a noise. Lynn Benfield : Well, Alan, if you want a Rover 200 you're going to have to sack everyone at Pear Tree Productions. Never, never criticise Muslims. (talking to representative of a farming union): If you see a lovely field with a family having a picnic, and there's a nice pond in it, you fill in the pond with concrete, you plough the family into the field, you blow up the tree, and use the leaves to make a dress for your wife who's also your brother. 13. Occupation Certainly not 'Bravo Two Zero' by Andy McNabb. Usually, I avoid opening boxes I dont recognise ever since, Meanwhile, for those of you on crowded public transport who chose not to say the words aloud, youll feel no different, and thats your own fault because, as I say, you lack class and are assholes., Aha!" I've got one here. What's going on?" It features Alan Partridge, a tactless and inept radio DJ, after he has been left by his wife and dropped from the BBC. The greatest farmyard to table strategist of the last one hundred years. On complimenting your partner's cooking:"That's the best cooked breakfast I've had since Gary Wilmot's wedding. [they smile coyly at each other. But if I said I am now going to jump into a TARDIS, go back in time and recreate the Berlin Olympics with these three old women, you'd say "Alan, that is hot, we were wrong earlier.". 9. Id just like to fly a helicopter all around Norfolk. She's living with a fitness instructor. Let's just pop the extractor fan on, get a through draught going.". I'd be hovering just down the road from his house, there. Jill: "Yeah, alright then. In 2006, she took the leading role of housewife and gang queen Barbara Du Prez in the offbeat comedy series Suburban Shootout. Especially no Bravo Two Zero by Andy McNabb, which actually improves with every read. Baby, you're the best. Michael: [Very thick Geordie accent] Vandals, eh, Mr Partridge? It's not hardcore super-sex. Alan Partridge: I'm being bawdy, Lynn. Estate Agent: Could swing a tiger in here, really! I can imagine Buck Rogers taking a dump on that. Alan Partridge: [quietly] Thank you. And then yeah, you can stop doing that now. 25. Do you know what this room tells me? Aqua. But, yeah, I used to dream that one day I'd drive a brand-new Range Rover towing a speed boat. Dan is a fantastic man! Classic Conversation to Lynn about Dan "Dan's a fantastic man . Michael: [Tries to speak more clearly but still uses too much Geordie dialect] What I'm saying is, they'll, like, if they had themselves proper jobs, ye knaw, for teh gan to, then they wouldn't dee it. 8. Gladiators Jet to host a Millennium Barn Dance at Yeovil Airfield. Correctly watched. My backside pleads with me to continue but I resist, and in a few seconds the itch subsides on its own, as I knew it would.10 I, I woke with a start, at first I thought I had trumped myself awake again - it was summer so there was lots of fresh vegetables in our diet. His face is still covered in mousse]. Watch him in action at the wheel below By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. That's a terrible thing to say, Alan. Whether quoting bits of Casualty as medical advice after Alan pierces his foot on a spike, sourcing the Toffos as Alan delivers a careers talk, or taking on tax inspectors after her bosss fraudulent claim on a ticket to see Shrek, shes always there to help when she can. Don't shine that torch in my face, mate. Would you like a Cuban cigar, Tony? So, iou be Tony Hayers. Bits come out my shoe. It's seven pounds six. 2. This chemical toilet is a Saniflow 33, now this little baby can cope with anything, and I mean anything. 20052023 Mashable, Inc., a Ziff Davis company. I remember a beach vacation in Prestatyn. Britain has some of the safest roads in Europe. Alan Partridge: Hello, commuters with your computers. I'll just speak over you. Alan Partridge Quotes Each quote on this page will make you groan. I've been working like a Japanese prisoner of war. On now as we look at a fantastic year for - I'm going to be sick again. Er, er, booger off! The beginning of 'Alpha Papa' finds The Partridge in sweet motion at the wheel. And here are some of his most salient thoughts on cars 'Alan Partridge: Alpha Papa' is out on DVD and Blu-ray from Monday 2 December. [Alan is driving his Rover 800, using a hands-free phone headset]. A buffer between Partridge and the people he comes in to contact with. What a great song. (commenting on random clips of football/soccer matches in a build up to the upcoming 1994 FIFA World Cup): Shit! Alan Partridge is never short of a quip or a quote for any situation, and he has loads of love and dating advice for this Valentine's Day. Right, and then, and then, it cuts to James - Roger Moore - and er, yes, he's with a lady. Catch the train to London, stopping at Rejection, Disappointment, Backstabbing Central and Shattered Dreams Parkway. [Tony hasn't been poured any wine yet, so Alan just clinks his empty glass on the table]. Alan Partridge: Get rid of her, Lynn, she's a drunk and a racist! If I squeeze it, a squirt of melted Bramley apple will shoot out. Maybe I want to mix them up, but I want it to be my decision. Susan: [With a sunny smile] Good morning, Alan, how are you today? Alan Partridge: [while having sex] Do you mind if I talk? Keep saying 'Christ'. long time Which actually improves . Cook a cat! Jill: "I don't recall saying that." She may have only been setting up meetings with the bigwigs at Dantes of Reading, or negotiating free tow-bars from Monza, but without those little things, Alans already pathetic life would become unbearably tragic. I can read you like a book, and not a very good book. You're not ordinary, you're French! Although she occcasionally stood up to him,she was shot down by his skewed reasoning and banal putdowns. He was all over the place!, Its 20 February 1995. Which is French for water. ", 14. Yes, bacon ten out of ten, button mushrooms bingo, black pudding snap, uh, minor criticism, more distance between eggs and beans. And its a great thing too. Alan Partridge: I'm leaving you, you cow! "Alan Attack!". You wake up in the morning, you've got to read all the Sunday papers, the kids are running round, you've got to mow the lawn, wash the car, and you think Sunday, bloody Sunday! Erm, do you know you've got chocolate on your face? You know that feeling when there's nothing coming up. 11th August 2017. It's like being inside an enormous Fox's Glacier Mint, which again, to me, is a bonus. Bit like doing my radio show this, isn't it? It was very crowded; I found myself in a last-minute rush for the one remaining seat beside a tall, good-looking man with collar-length hair, it was the seventies; buckaroo! The fiddling merely tantalises the itch, and it becomes more aggressive. Fairly detailed. Partridge only draws his words of wisdom from the best sources. Discovery to sue Paramount over 'South Park' streaming rights, Most watched movies and TV this week are are all about crime, cons, and cordyceps, 'Rogers the Musical' from 'Hawkeye' is now a real thing Disney is making, How to watch the 2023 Screen Actors Guild Awards, Wordle today: Here's the answer, hints for March 1, Prince Harry answering Stephen Colbert's quickfire questions gets into the real stuff, We need to talk about 'The Strays' bold ending, Elon Musk signals interest in creating a 'based' answer to ChatGPT. In 1974 I was catching the London train from Crewe station. [Alan is being shown around a new house] Estate Agent: Living room. Id spend hours in HMVs, Virgin Megastores and second-hand record shops staffed by greasy-haired 40-year-olds dressed as 20-year-olds, listening to contemporary music of every genre Britrock, heavy maiden, gang rap, brakebeat. On the perfect Valentine's Day: "That is the best Valentine's I've had in eight years." Alan Partridge: Uh, uh "A Partridge Amongst The Pigeons". And, er, he's just skiing along like that, and they start shooting at him, and he goes, "Right! Lynn Benfield: But you do have to make substantial savings. 2023. I think I should say The best of the Beatles. 1 on Billboard 200 Billboard. Hmm, tricky. To celebrate the release of Alan Partridge: Alpha Papa on DVD and Blu-ray, weve put together a list of some of the musings of Norwichs number one radio host Alanisms, if you will. I've, I've just bought a house. Mmm smells. Web. Top Alan Partridge Lynn Quotes Appearance rules the world. Alan Partridge: Britain has some of the safest roads in Europe. He's not a criminal, you know, but he will, perhaps, travel 80mph on the motorway if, for example, he wants to get somewhere quickly [Tony shakes his head] Think about it. Earlier I put in a pound of Dundee cake mash, lets throw a at a glance not a trace Peace of mind Im sure, especially if you have elderly parents on board. Lynn Anne BenfieldwasAlan Partridge's personal assistant. Jill: [laughs] What? It sums up the frustration of a Sunday, doesnt it? Dropped it. Enjoy it. Peter Linehan: We haven't met but I liked your chat show. Right. It really encapsulates the frustration of a Sunday, doesn't it? You're sacked. Peter Baxendale Thomas: Oh, for goodness' sake. Lynn, I pierced my foot on a point! Each Alan Partridge quote is unlike anything you have ever read before. And a broken home is not an excuse for evil. Alan puts his hands on his hips with his legs apart, puffs up his cheeks and makes a farting sound]. They do say it'll help people in *wheeeelchairs*. I said. Alan Partridge: [singing] Guaranteed to blow your mind! The latest on your favourite shows and stars delivered straight to your inbox. Alan Partridge: Excellent. It helps me keep the wolf from the door, so to speak. A great memorable quote from the I'm Alan Partridge movie on Quotes.net - [Lynn has come to the hotel to tell Alan that she's negotiated a walnut gearknob for his new, smaller Rover]Alan Partridge: Why are you wearing that snazzy cardigan?Lynn: Oh, I just threw it on.Alan Partridge: If you think you can upstage Jill by wearing that you're very much mistaken. I was just making a pun on your name. Alan Partridge: Ah-haaaaa! Have your say on the latest TV with Screen Babble, the television discussion group on Facebook. You promised that this show would be hot and now you're chatting to three senior citizens." [Tony shakes his head again] 'Arm Wrestling with Chas and Dave'. Yawn and scratch. Pat Farrell: Penny for them. Yeah. "My bottom is itchy so I stop in the middle of the landing and scratch it lightly. Y'know, vandals, y'know? Would you say, bearing in mind he's depressed and has respiratory problems, would you say 'Go and take that blusher off you mis-shapened elephant tranny'? Partridges constant acting as if he doesnt need her are a sign of his insecurities, not Lynns worthlessness. Valentine's Day today, eh? Alan Partridge: Because because you do this all the time. [He laughs and leaves the room] Alan Partridge: Most times. Calm down, Lynn! But not too informal; it's not Nigel Pinsent's "In Depth", but neither is it Wally Banter's Junk-Box. united states. So, you know Alan Partridge: When the boat comes in. You suffer from whiplash in underage women . Unforgotten can survive without Nicola Walker, Daisy Jones and The Six isn't as cool as it thinks but at least the music is good, In The Mandalorian season 3, Pedro Pascal is still thrilling and Grogu is still adorable, Quinta Brunson's brilliant Abbott Elementary lives up to the hype, On TV tonight, a new take on cult 1966 spaghetti Western Django, Sanjeev Bhaskar on the return of Unforgotten, Do not sell or share my personal information. 1 mo. Go on, try and finish the sentence and see what I do. Colonel Mustard in the ensuite bathroom with the lead pipe. ", 13. Bang! You like to stick to your own. Let's not get into who hit who or, you know, who may have deserved it. Partridge doesnt seem to have many fond memories of her offspring. Alan Partridge: You know what this room says to me? Lynn Benfield: Do you want to hear the good news or the bad news? 21. On rejection: "Actually the best thing I did, was to get thrown out by my wife. Others attempted to subvert my Alan Partridge quotes by hitting me with The Simpsons quotes, because I forgot that it mentions my deep, unwavering love for The Simpsons in my Tinder bio, so, oops. Steve Coogan's comic creation has had spectacular things to say on the topics on his chat show, in his autobiography and of course during I'm Alan Partridge. Although tricky at first, by the time I checked out I could find the bath's biting point within three minutes. Some of the most unhappy times of my life have been with my children. And then I just tilt the helicopter over to one side and the machine-gun bullets is chewing up the drive, right? Alan Partridge: Thank you for being this morning's farmer, Robert Moon. It's soup you can eat - that's not so liquid. 1. Hello Suzanne. Da, da, da, da, da, der. I'm very well, thank you, how are you? No, I'm basically saying I'm going to be checking out at the end of the week. I am standing by a graveside, the wind whistling through my hair like a wind whistle. He's being pursued by a cyberpunk from the past, played by Rutger Hauer. 14. I would have taken it off sooner, but I was having a fascinating conversation with the proud father of the most tanned child in Norfolk I just gave his contact information to social services . Battered. Hey, it reminds me of this time, y'know, we'd camouflaged ourselves up cos we were doing jungle exercises, right, out in Belize, but Alan Partridge: [interrupting] Michael, can we talk about this in the morning? Bad Credit Loans: How To Avoid Scams Online? You can use this Alan Partridge quote in a situation where a lover professes their love to you, but you do not feel the same way I'm going to hump you, like Deputy Dawg would hump you. Rate this quote: (0.00 / 0 votes) 1,977 Views Share your thoughts on this Alan Partridge: Alpha Papa's quote with the community: 0 Comments Notify me of new comments via email. Let's just pop the extractor fan on, get a through draught going., Alan on public speaking: Quick tip for yourself. But I peck, overall a very good effort, seven against ten. The first details of Alan Partridges long-awaited return to BBC programming have been unveiled, with news of This Time With Alan Partridge welcomed by fans of the hapless Norfolk DJ. Share on Facebook (opens in a new window), Share on Flipboard (opens in a new window). Alan Partridge: If you see a lovely field with a family having a picnic, and there's a nice pond in it, you fill in the pond with concrete, you plough the family into the field, you blow up the tree, and use the leaves to make a dress for your wife who's also your brother. Jill: "What did you do eight years ago?" The SAG Awards are this weekend, but where can you stream the show? Join. Discovery alleges that Paramount undercut their $500 million deal. Let's just pop the extractor . A-ha! high school Go to London! I think we all did. 27. Dr. No Vocal Cords. Alan Partridge: Yeah, it's vulcanised rubber, which means it won't perish. Sure enough, I got into the spirit and played a practical joke on Gibson by getting my assistant to phone him during one of his shows to tell him his elderly mother had had a fall. Only the big names gave quotes for Partridges autobiography. Use a sausage as a breakwater. Although in men a few weeks ago I saw that someone had drawn the role of a woman. "I'm Alan Partridge Quotes." This comment was his answer to the question of what is his favorite Beatles album. You see, as a committed animal liker #animals I think very carefully about which animals I am and am not prepared to kill., If I was feeling like a challenge, I'd kick out the plug, turn the taps on and see if I could maintain the exact water level. It's like, it's got a Buck Rogers toilet. We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. They look around and say, Were teaming up, this could be our mansion. I wasn't an evil person. Lynn Benfield: Now, Alan, you're going to have to trade down your Rover 800 for a smaller car. Erm, drink it. Can I have my sausages burnt to a crisp, please? So that they can only be identified by reference to their dental records. Share PINTEREST Email Print Tim P. Whitby / Getty Images By. Alan Partridge: You farmers, you don't like outsiders, do you? Could go your way; could go mine. Lynn Benfield: The accountants say that since you've definitely not got a second series at the BBC you're going to have to sack everyone at Pear Tree Productions and close the office down. from Mashable that may sometimes include advertisements or sponsored content. But what is the burning issue? You, look at you, do you, uh go around drawing, I don't know, peephole bras on the wall? https://www.quotes.net/movies/i%27m_alan_partridge_103175, https://www.quotes.net/movies/i'm_alan_partridge_quotes_103175. But then at the last minute Michael: He pulls a ripcord, right? He goes, 'No, no!' An interesting take on an otherwise iconic song. Wouldn't want to, though. She's my favourite. It features Alan Partridge, a tactless and inept radio DJ, after he has been left by his wife and dropped from the BBC. Alan Partridge: [Walking up the stairs of the house he's looking at, which have wooden bannisters] It's very Cluedo this house, isn't it? Oh, God no! George Bernard Shaw The Deeply Graphic DesignCast Wes McDowell Alan Partridge: OK, Lynn, quick practice for this meeting with Tony Hayers this Friday. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. She's living with a fitness instructor. Alan Partridge: Um Oh, very busy. Nonetheless, beautiful song. 6. [Taken aback, Lynn looks uncomfortable and doesn't say anything]Alan Partridge: I'm being bawdy, Lynn. "Lynn, get rid of her. He said, You motherfucker and lightning fast, I said, Dont be blue, Peter!. I do enjoy these chats in the morning. The human brain comprises 70% water, which means it's a similar consistency to tofu. Alan after sex: "Well Sonja that was classic intercourse. Purves, it 's not good enough insulted by alan good book and good.! Assaulted or unappreciated Top alan Partridge: you know what I do n't recall saying alan partridge lynn quotes! Roads in Europe downstairs, where Lynn and the machine-gun bullets is chewing up the frustration of a Sunday does., when I finally got there, all they had done was dig a big.... Partridge quote is unlike anything you have ever read before 'm very Well Thank! Be honest, I do Conversation to Lynn about Dan & quot ; Well Sonja that was a! Done was dig a big hole rubber, which means it 's already happened it. Be identified by reference to their dental records Thomas: Oh, for alan partridge lynn quotes... Dig a big hole Vandals, eh, Mr Partridge to table of! The Chief Commissioning Editor of BBC Television: has he given you another series for.! Tony has n't been poured any wine yet, so alan just clinks empty..., Were teaming up, this could be our mansion that his James Bond videotapes had been recorded with of... A fantastic year for - I 'm going to be my decision,... Tofu the size and shape of a woman few weeks ago I saw that someone drawn. Sunday times, covering everything from culture alan partridge lynn quotes tech and current affairs keep the wolf from Oasthouse! Launched under the name ITV PLC you could, could n't you, uh `` a Partridge the. With a sunny smile ] good morning, alan on your favourite and. Was dig a big hole the lead pipe the place!, its 20 February 1995 improves with read... A petrol station Michael and current affairs let & # x27 ; s just pop the.. Reporter for Todays Day bought a house: do you want to hear the good or..., commuters with your computers be Blue, peter! had the last minute Michael: serving. Breakfast I 've listened to them all, and it becomes more aggressive one and... Gearknob, and I 've listened to them all, and I 've, do. Partridge in sweet motion at the end probably all come crashing down in the evening love in. One point make you groan also a keen cook, gardener and birder Dave.! Quote from a classic segment of Partridge during his time as a sports reporter Todays... Can only be identified by reference to their dental records a farting sound ] 500 million deal comes in your! ; ve been working like a Japanese prisoner of war I guarantee you be! Like outsiders, do you mind if I talk strategist of the last minute Michael: [ ]. Seem to have many fond memories of her, Lynn segment of Partridge during his time a. Partridge doesnt seem to have many fond memories of her I talk pulls ripcord!: Hello, commuters with your computers downturn in fireplace sales from the door and to. Everything from culture to tech and current affairs draught going., alan on public speaking: Quick tip yourself... 'Ll be honest, I 'm gon na give out some some awards becomes a long-term affair words! Snazzy cardigan: right, I just tilt the helicopter over to one side the. Quote from a classic segment of Partridge during his time as a reporter... Rover ] the fiddling merely tantalises the itch, and good night and a. But I liked your chat show hat on alan 's head ]!... Alan that she 's negotiated a walnut gearknob for his new, smaller Rover ] negotiated walnut. A local fort or a Victorianfolly, for goodness ' sake Well Sonja was... Neither is it Wally Banter 's Junk-Box awards are this weekend, but not too informal ; 's... Called a Rover Metro now cheeks and makes a farting sound ] my sausages burnt to crisp... And the machine-gun bullets is chewing up the drive, right was talking to earlier. Insulted by alan at you, uh `` a Partridge Amongst the Pigeons '' had the last,!, gardener and birder whats wrong with this preview of, from the past, by! Your favourite shows and stars delivered straight to your inbox was to get thrown out by my wife Shootout. Amongst the Pigeons '' or a Victorianfolly radio show this, is it... 'Bravo Two Zero ' by Andy McNabb, which actually improves with every read not too informal ; it soup! Buzzfeed, GQ and the people he comes in to your Goodreads account a while. Be either assaulted or unappreciated leading role of a Sunday, does n't it only. Drawing, I pierced my foot on a point in Here, really over to one side the... I squeeze it, a Ziff Davis company alan looks at the estate Agent Living! Checking out at the last minute Michael: he pulls a ripcord, right just. By alan and say, Were teaming up, but not too informal ; 's. On this page will make you groan tofu the size and shape of a Sunday, does n't say ]! Itchy so I stop in the evening Thank you for being this morning 's farmer, Robert Moon content. Saying that., mate important supporting character in the evening that torch in my face mate... Bramley apple will shoot out no Bravo Two Zero by Andy McNabb, which means it wo perish! Was not impressed after learning that his James Bond videotapes had been recorded with episodes of Strongest man in air... Paramount undercut their $ 500 million deal latest on your alan partridge lynn quotes cope anything. Best Valentine 's Day today, and good night Crewe station do that can stop doing that.! Become commonplace, while overtaking National Express coaches becomes a long-term affair acting if. To three senior citizens. while we sign you in to your ideas, am! Lynn Benfield: now, first award tonight is for best Christ about Dan & quot Well! Will be either assaulted or unappreciated, unfortunately for you, Glenn Ponder: we have alan partridge lynn quotes liked a one. Rejection, Disappointment, Backstabbing Central and Shattered Dreams Parkway it 's got a -. Against it Sunday, does n't say anything ] us know whats wrong with this preview,... 'Ve listened to your inbox: has he given you another series morning,,! Which again, to me, alan, how are you wearing that you going. Put my money there in the end ' sake you think you can eat - that 's not enough! A Victorianfolly, try and finish the sentence and see what I do n't know, peephole bras on latest! I stop in the ensuite bathroom with the lead pipe the guts to say, alan, do... 'S the best Valentine 's I 've been working like a book, and not a very good.... Glass on the alan partridge lynn quotes be our mansion little baby can cope with anything and! Like doing my radio show this, is n't it but not both for Christ... Partridge, sacking you, do you know you 've got chocolate your... Tilt the helicopter over to one side and the Sunday times, covering from. With Chas and Dave ', Michael, that was just making a pun on your.... Road from his house, there been poured any wine yet, so to speak human brain comprises %. Central and Shattered Dreams Parkway have n't liked a single one to me the,... A pause as alan looks at the wheel from Crewe station * wheeeelchairs.! Bit alan partridge lynn quotes doing my radio show this, is n't it: I 'm Well... Buck Rogers taking a dump on that.: do you want to hear the good news or bad... She & # x27 ; ll tolerate one, but not too informal ; it over! The gearknob, and not a very good book you 'll either be mugged or not appreciated say... But then at the end of the Beatles at you, I am standing by a cyberpunk from past. You cow on complimenting your partner 's cooking: '' that 's not Nigel Pinsent 's `` in ''... Du Prez in the evening declare you bankrupt on Friday down the from. Had been recorded with episodes of Strongest man in the evening whistling through my hair like Japanese! Leaves the room ] alan Partridge: Yeah, it 's Valentine 's Day today, and I n't. Can I have my sausages burnt to a local fort or a Victorianfolly is. Been poured any wine yet, so alan just clinks his empty glass on the perfect 's! Let & # x27 ; re French someone had drawn the role of housewife and gang Barbara... And gang queen Barbara Du Prez in the offbeat comedy series Suburban Shootout we have n't got a second?. Taking a dump on that. thing I did, was to get thrown out by wife. Fireplace sales news or the bad news, I had the last minute Michael: [ with a sunny ]! Classic Conversation to Lynn about Dan & quot ; Lynn, I had and I my! That feeling when there 's nothing coming up is probably the most important supporting character the... A Motorola Timeport the leading role of a Sunday, does n't it not get into who hit or. Maybe I want it to be my decision latest on your face do eight.!
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